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JOKING ASIDE

Issue: 04/08/2017

Star Turn


What name for a group of your breed?

A 'Grumble' of Pugs
A 'Bounce' of Border Terriers
A 'Prance' of Poodles
A 'Wag' of Cockers

Send your suggestions to lyndaward@pettradesolutions.com

(B. Marriott, Pilsley)





Advice from the dog - Smells every dog should roll in!

Rubbish - a true potpourri of nasty odours.  Rubbish bags may contain anything from fuzzy lasagne to dirty nappies.  Toppling over a bin after a hot holiday weekend produces the very best bounty!
Carcasses - best quality available on warm humid days.  You can occasionally strike lucky in the garden, but the best troves are usually found during a walk in the woods, on the side of the road or at the beach during low tide.
Poo - preferably fresh.  If you live on or near a farm go for the cow pats - they're particularly pungent and clingy.
Fetid ponds - a pungent combination of wetness and decay as they may also contain bonus carcasses.  Most often found in woodlands but may be as close as the garden if your owner is too lazy to clean it out.

(F. Holmes, Colchester)

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