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JOKING ASIDE

Issue: 08/12/2017

Toys for Xmas!

Yes, our lovely owners will be giving us lots of presents specifically for us dogs this Xmas, but why wait for Xmas - here are some DIY toys we can get for ourselves in the meantime …

Top of the list - SOCKS!  Usually to be found at dad's side of the bed - don't worry even if he still has them on, just a few hard tugs will often get them off without even disturbing his snores.  But wait…the very best are to be found in teenage boys' bedrooms - yummy - just peek inside and you'll be amazed at the selection - easy prey!!

CUSHIONS!  Lovely and soft and squidgy to lie on, but even better when shredded and strewn around and then a great game of 'I can get it before you can' when mum's trying to clear the bits up!

RUGS!  Smashing to slide around on and brilliant for giving your muscles a good work-out when shaking them.  Also nibbling around the edges can make such interesting shapes to look back at in times to come and for all the family to admire your artistry - they'll definitely stand back in awe!

CANDLES!  An acquired taste, but if you prefer not to eat them just enjoy chomping them up into tiny little pieces and trampling into the carpet - it's a great boredom reliever and you can also play 'find missed bits' after the main mess has been cleaned up!

CURTAINS!  If boredom really sets in curtains can be a source of fun.  Don't mess about with the long ones that go down to the floor, give yourself a real challenge and try jumping up at the short ones - hours of fun and if you're especially athletic and have a strong jaw you can grab them and swing about until they give way and you and the curtain end up in a heap on the floor!

XMAS TREE DECORATIONS!  Now we're talking - these are for the connoisseur!  They come in all shapes and sizes and often have sparkly bits on that stick to your tongue and take ages to lick off.  The ball shaped ones are obviously best as if you're careful you can have a long game with these before they break.  Just remember…. when the debris is discovered, look angelic and blame the cat!!
(B. Walker, Dundee)

What do you know?

Who wrote, "Love me, love my dog"?
Name the Clampett's dog in The Beverly Hillbillies?
In which Canterbury Tale are Spaniels mentioned?
What does the statue of the Siberian Husky, Balto, in Central Park, New York commemorate?
Who wrote "The Hound of the Baskervilles"?
(anon)

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