Today (April 1st) saw the launch of a new group to fight prejudice and ageism in the world of dogs.

The move comes following the Kennel Club chairman’s disparaging remarks in the press about elderly and ageing columnists’ comments on the dog scene forcing people to grow dahlias.

The Dahlia Owners’ Group met in a small cafe just off the A1 in Lincolnshire to forge an alliance of columnists who actually do grow dahlias and like dogs as well.

The is a cross party alliance has journalists and columnists from the papers of both hues and it was clear that they meant business.

‘My blooms have won ribbons since the Great War’, said one lady whose activities ‘on the land’ are infamous, ‘How dare he suggest that we are driving people away, the young whippersnapper’, she concluded.

Another, noted for his consumption of red wine, exclaimed, ‘It would be a
good idea if these youngster studied dahlia breeding before getting let loose on dogs. Do you know I talk just as much to my dahlias as I do my dogs.’

The group, which plans further disparate meeting in bars at draughty venues up and down the country, resolved to send the Kennel Club chairman flowers to remind him of his offending remark.

‘We are going to send him DAHLIAS of course,’ said the newly elected Secretary.’